MetaFic

Avery’s Fanfic Review

Title: Harry Potter: Lost
Author: Bear

Link: http://www.siye.co.uk/siye/viewstory.php?sid=128652
Status: Complete – 10 chapters with a sequel being posted

Summary
The Wizarding world is enjoying a period of peace. It has been ten years since Lord Voldemort fell, defeated in mysterious circumstances by the Potter family who gave their lives for the safety of the Wizarding world. However a mysterious Hogwarts letter and a plot against a ministry employee threaten to destabilise Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Review

I began reading this story after the author had posted three or four chapters, and I found myself pleasantly surprised that it quickly drew me in to the story. The story follows a young orphan named Adam. Although it is never revealed in the story and is one of the mysteries of the story, the assumption can be made that Adam is Harry Potter.

Adam is an orphan on the streets. His history is sketchy at best, but it is implied that he has been the ward of at least one, if not several, abusive foster families. As the story opens he is nearing his eleventh birthday and Minerva McGonagall has found his very odd Hogwarts letter that simply states:

-
Behind the Bins,
Lane off Mare Street,
London.

Minerva sets out to find this boy who avoids her and is not found again until the following year. He is brought to Hogwarts and decides to come to the school. On the way to the school he befriends a new first year, Ginny Weasley, and thus a rewrite of Chamber of Secrets begins.

This is definitely not just a retelling of the original Chamber of Secrets, although many of the incidents in the book are not significantly changed. However, the author was smart enough to realize that Adam would have an impact on the story, but not one that would modulate Ginny’s involvement. I don’t want to give away any points of the story, but the character interactions are very well done. The conclusions characters come to through the addition of Adam in the mix also are logical and rather ingenious at times.

I am not a huge fan of how the author breaks his prose up. He uses character names and dates as section headings, which I consider sloppy and lazy. I think the prose itself should determine time change and POV change. However, the multiple POV’s allow the story to be told in a much deeper manner than just through Adam’s POV.

The grammar is good. The author uses a beta team, and I noticed few consistent grammar issues. The writing gets better as the story develops, showing that the author is learning and trying to be a better writer. The author also update quickly, so either he has completely written the story before he starts posting or he is a quick writer.

Overall, I recommend this story. It is a quick read at only 43,420 words, but it is engaging and fun. I am looking forward to what happens in the sequel and unraveling the mystery of Adam.

Rating
all rating is done on a scale of 0 to 5.
N/A - not applicable and does not calculate into overall rating.
0 - Atrocious
1 - Mistakes present, needs polish and work, - avoid if you are easily annoyed
2 - Acceptable - meets the basic standards of readability. Needs to be polished and improved. Some items will make you wince. Nit-pickers avoid
3 - Excellent - Few errors and engaging. What I require for any author I beta for.
4 - Superb - little room for improvement, and perfect technique
5 - Exceptional. Polished, original, and/or ground breaking

Grammar: 3
Prose: 2
Plot: 3
Characters: 3
Originality: 4
Cannon: 3
Overall: 3

P.S. If you have read this story, I'd like to see how you rate it. Also, please keep this thread focused on this story or at least this author. Thanks, Jonathan.